PHat ethics test tomorrow, and with a borderline grade you’d think I’d be a study maniac tonight, but alas I am writing a blog as Laura Jansen* plays in the background <3
I think… I lost the heart for this blog. I tried denying it, telling myself that this is an easy way to keep certain people updated with what’s going on in my head. Not to be blunt but I’m over this, and those that matter the most will always know what’s going on in my head without this blog. However, I am very proud of my new york and boston babies who tell of their east coast adventures and I like imagining.
I take a lot of things too seriously. Also, I’m constantly looking to something in the future. At the moment it’s summer and being free again. Then I stop and think to myself, why do I always put myself in this waiting period? This isn’t the first time that I’ve told myself to just… chill, and be here in the Now. I feel like this may be a major cause to my common lethargy. I am fully motivated to do everything… that isn’t what I’m supposed to do. One thing on my ethics test tomorrow is about how much humans ask for and how it is beyond the capacity that the world can provide. This is completely true and understandable, but sometimes I just need to be selfish for a sec, if it’s even selfishness. This is the part when I bitch and moan about what I want and can’t wait for.
I want:
To be home with my family
Chlo’s cooking
To ride my bike to my best friend’s house
To be where it’s quiet and where no one will bother me
To run
To shop
To drive to a philosophy meeting
Time – to read, listen to music, stare, sleep, write, and contemplate
I probs sound super unsatisfied at the moment, but it’s only because my English class is pissing me off, the US passport application system is bullshit, I have an ethics test ready to murder my GPA, the fact that I actually care about my GPA, I have a month in this room, I still need a summer job, and, well I’m actually very satisfied and appreciative of everything I have now. I mean, it could be worse, I could have aids right?
On a lighter note, Ashtastic comes in roughly 2 days. Stoked. And finally, the roommate and i stalked a facebook tonight and laughed at a lot of pictures. I don't even care. ha! hang loose
Tis all!
*“oh I’d like forever after like every princess should, but there’s always another chapter, and the apple sure tastes good!”
